Wedding Anniversary Remembered

Rueful

            Today is Wednesday, the 14^th of January, 2004.  Last Sunday, January 11^th, my son and his wife came over after church.  As an anniversary gift, they presented us with a gift certificate for a meal at Red Lobster.  One of the things which Ann and I both enjoy is dining out and Red Lobster is one of the restaurants we enjoy the most.  I especially like eating lobster.  We thanked them and I thought to myself that perhaps on our anniversary, the 13^th, we would go out for supper and spend the certificate.

            Monday evening, the 12^th, I drove up to Mar Dels, a Christian book store, to purchase a cover for my Bible.  While there I looked at the anniversary cards and purchased one I thought appropriate.  At home I put it on my night stand to keep until the 13^th.

Tuesday morning, the 13^th, I arose at my usual 5:00 AM and prepared for work.  I carefully carried the card into the bathroom and placed it on top of my eyeglasses to be absolutely sure I would not forget it.  Then with my teeth (what are left of them) brushed, and my hair (I still have some) combed, I signed the card and carried it into the dining room and placed it on the table where Ann would see it when she sat down to read the paper.  It really gave me a good feeling, and I was pleased with myself.  At break time at work talking to a colleague, Les Shively, who I have known for more than 20 years, I said, “Well Les, I’ve been married 40 years today”.  He congratulated me and told me that his anniversary was 2 days ago, the 11^th, and that it was his 48^th.  Les and I have worked together at Tinker Air Force Base in Oklahoma and at Sheppard Air Force Base in Texas for several years, and while he was telling me this I had sort of a twinge of non-deja-vu, i.e., I thought to myself, since our anniversaries were so close, that surely in the years we have worked together, we must have had that conversation before.

There was also this peculiar thought way in the back of my mind:  Why don’t I ever remember having our wedding anniversary on Friday the 13^th.  I can’t remember for certain what day we were married, but I think it was on a Sunday.  I was wondering what the probability was in 40 years that January 13^th would be on Friday at least once.

Home from work about noon, I parked my pick-up truck and walked in.  I’ve gotten old enough that an afternoon nap is nice.  On my way to my nap I asked Ann, “Did you find your card”?   She told me she had and it was a nice card.  Satisfied with myself, I sat down in my rocking chair and rested for about an hour.

After napping I checked my email and finished the crossword puzzle.  Later I went to the library and checked out some books.  Soon it was supper time.  We all sat down at the table, I said Grace, and we began eating.  I can’t remember much of the conversation until suddenly, out of the blue, with no preliminary words Ann said, “Today is Mama and Daddy’s wedding anniversary”.  She was speaking of her Mother and Father.  Now this was one of those world shaking moments for me:  I felt a little bit like you feel just before you sign your name to some important document, a mortgage or a car loan—just an inner tenseness or apprehensiveness.  Something was wrong.  Now a real fast thinking guy would have contemplated those words carefully, and considered what response to make.  He would perhaps have said to himself, why is she telling me right now about her parent’s anniversary, or maybe thought back to see what conversation developed into that thought.  A good response might have been something like, “Hmm”, or “How long ago were they married”, or “That’s nice”.  A real fast thinking guy might have thought to himself something like:  If their anniversary is the same as ours, why don’t I remember that it is.  Why don’t I remember celebrating together at least once in the past?

I was just thunderstruck by the thought that their anniversary was the same day as ours and that no one had ever told me.  I guess I am a typical male in that I remember my birthday, my wife’s birthday, my children’s birthdays, and my anniversary.  Other dates are just not in my memory bank.

I blurted out, “Do you mean their anniversary is the same day as ours”?  I was ready to go further with statements such as:  Why don’t I remember that, and You have never told me that before when Ann responded, “No.  Our anniversary was the 11^th, 2 days ago.  Theirs is the 13^th.

As they said in Rome, “Mea Culpa”.  I couldn’t even plead nolo contendre.  I am plumb guilty.  Of course there are degrees of guilt.  I am not as guilty as a guy who forgot about his anniversary completely—I just got the day wrong.  After all, I got it right 39 times—that’s 97.5% of the time.

I know you guys are laughing as you read this, thinking what an idiot I am, but be warned:  It can happen to you too, and then you will be just as rueful as I am.